Whoa.

I'm posting this for two reasons. First, I wanted to dry imbedding a YouTube video.

Second, omyfreakinggod. I don't know if this is a real trailer or not, but it's crazy.

the monkeysphere

I read this a number of years ago and have been quoting it ever since. I always said that if I had a blog I'd post it, therefore, I know longer have excuses.

But seriously, the rightness of this is astounding, right down to the sarcastic nature of it all. I mean, people are shallow. If we'd all accept this about ourselves we'd be much happier, not to mention much kinder to one another.

Welcome to my monkeysphere: http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/monkeysphere.html



Now Playing: Mystifies Me - Son Volt

EXACTLY

I suppose this is my coming out of sorts, but who the hell cares about secrecy anyway. My insecurity can stuff itself in a sock. So yeah, this is your friendly neighborhood Brad actually writing stuff on his blog. Forget that silly idea I had, it failed. Moving on.

This article inspired me to actually start writing stuff again, but it's SO GOSH-DARNED TRUE. I have been spouting this for YEARS. I'm shouting because I REALLY MEAN IT.

Anyway, read the article, and know why long rambling songs (American Pie notwithstanding, genius only happens once in a great while. See the rest of Don McLean's oeuvre for proof) never make my playlists. Or very very rarely. You know how I hate superlatives.

http://www.themorningnews.org/archives/oped/two_minutes_and_42_seconds_in_heaven.php

Now Playing: Life's a Gas - T. Rex (which, in case you're wondering, clocks in at 2:25.)

popov's revenge

The boy watched the ants closely. They worked continuously, no pausing, no resting. Awe-inspiring how they took tiny pieces and built huge colonies and tunnels and nurseries and pantries and god-knows-what-else. It was so intricate. Prodigious engineering wonders. Miracles of nature.

Feeling truly god-like by size and comparison, the boy raised his foot (or rather, holy instrument of justice) in order to administer a transcendental whoop-ass to his protectorate. In his blood-lust, he never noticed the oak behind him splintering near-noiselessly and receding to its new home on the earth.

Somewhere, a mime laughed out loud.

elephas maximas

I have enough trouble just getting on the subway to put up with their garbage. The constant staring and whispering. What the hell do they want from me? I'm big, deal with it. I have the kind of a tooth issue that orthodontists won't go near. The very real threat of domestication. I'd like to see them manage that shit.

Sometimes I wish I could just move to Kerala and be treated like a fucking god. My uncle Fil did that. He always said the Hindus had it right, and by Ganesh he lived the high life. No poaching, Ayurvedic dedoctions, best eats around, baths by cute mahouts... Damn.

I'm leaving this odious hellhole of a city.

neon

The lights give me a headache, but it's their eyes that are really depressing. I don't even know why I come any more, it doesn't excite me. Well, my body, anyway. I suppose I could be addicted to the melancholia...

When I win the lottery I'll open my own club: G-strings and Gloom. Nothing like truth in advertising.

rain

Fucking rain. I mean, I probably deserved it, but fucking still.

I went in the hall because the door was open. I'm not sure what I expected, but when I saw the food I went all in. Can't say I turned down the alcohol either. Scotch is, was, always will be my best friend.

So yeah, I got blitzed. Snockered. And apparantly, I got fun. Didn't matter that my heart was smashed, I was drunk and at a wedding of who-knows-the-fuck-who and it was a party. I remember taking the mic at some point, but fucking lord I have no idea what I said.

All I know now, a fucking month later, is that I got a picture of a wedding party in the mail. And I'm fucking in it. Nice, really. Good to know I'm part of a happy life, somewhere. I'll always be a fucking story. Couldn't ask for anything more.

Still, fucking rain.